How to tell whether it’s an urgent need or you can wait a couple of days more? Simply follow our user-friendly tips ;)
- You’re wearing your last pair of underwear in the shower consistently.
- You’ve worn your sheets to school because you can’t get them off of you.
- Your socks act like a shirt does when its heavily starched and emit a serious funk.
Or the top ten signs your parents were hippies in the 1960s.
10. You were baptized with bong water.
9. You find out you have 37 half sibings.
8. They don’t trust anyone over 65.7. When reminiscing about your birth, mom rates epidural as "weak, man".
6. Their idea of a drug talk is to tell you "If you’re going to do pot, smoke it! Brownies are a waste of good pot!"
Wanna join our Monster Cynics’ Club? We are now accepting applications. How to do it? Just add your definition below :) DENTURES:
Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one’s grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music.
DNA:
A complex organic molecule characterized as the building block of life and appropriately shaped like a spiral staircase to nowhere.
FIBER:
Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.
A stately manse occupied by transients who continually receive visitors but lack the energy and inclination to entertain them.
METALLURGIST:
A man who can look at a platinum blonde and tell whether she is virgin metal or a common ore.
MINUTE MAN:
One who double parks while he visits a sporting house.
MORNING:
The time of day when the rising generation retires, and the retiring generation arises.
MOTHER’S DAY:
Nine months after father’s day.
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